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lettersfrombel18 Tarsakh 1492 DR
Swamps near Moonhaven
My dear River,
Hags are now on my list of ‘beings to avoid if at all possible’. Largely we stopped in to see ‘Auntie Ethel’ because I don’t like leaving an enemy at our backs, but we interrupted her meeting with a potential victim, and… well, I made some decisions. Sensibly, I should have decided it was none of my business, but I didn’t, and I don’t really know why. Maybe I’m trying to convince Wyll that I am a good man, so I can get him into bed.
To no one’s surprise, the old woman that is literally called a hag and sells potions is an actual hag, and had a tidy little setup as a problem-solver, usually of the ‘be careful what you wish for’ variety. She did offer to try to remove Junior from my head, but I trust Master Halsin’s judgement that it is impossible, so I refused. She told me I’d make a very pretty mind flayer; I don’t know what makes a mind flayer pretty, but if you have to become a brain-eating abomination, you might as well look good doing it.
We found her ‘trophy room’ of people who made ill-advised wishes. Including a wood elf who had wished for foresight, and received the ability to see the fates of himself and others. For him, that meant death, because that one is probably true regardless of what one chooses in life. For me…
…River, when someone looks at me with fear, especially an elf, I make certain assumptions about why they are afraid of me. Namely, that I am a drow and I do try to look dangerous to discourage people trying to start trouble. I hadn’t realized until he named it that what he saw when he looked at me was the mind flayer I might become, and the final, painful transformation and carnage that results. Even after breaking the curse, and seeing that I was merely a drow, he could not be in the same room as me for long because of the sheer horror of those visions. I have to believe that Auntie Ethel wanted him to see only the worst parts of potential futures, or I’m going to go insane.
Auntie Ethel’s defenses were keyed to her magic, and that included an impressive mix of fire traps and poison clouds. To get close enough to deactivate the fire traps, one and to deactivate the poison, which was inside the clouds. Eventually we discovered that the masks she uses to compel people to fight for her disabled the traps when worn, and Shadowheart’s magic could prevent the wearer from falling under Ethel’s control though it was like fighting in deep water to keep moving.
Yes, our plan was to have me — after handing my good armor, weapons and other useful objects other than my tools to Karlach — put the damn mask on and lead everyone through the maze, disabling traps as I went. And I hope never to do it again, because while Shadowheart’s magic protected me from being controlled, I still had Auntie Ethel’s voice in my head trying to get me to drop my defenses and let her 'take care of me'. Such magic requires concentration, so I was very aware that if I missed a trap and Shadowheart was hurt, she might lose focus and suddenly the party would have to fight me until one of them could throw the protection spell back on me, or knock me out.
But Astarion and I are the only two who can disable traps reliably, and given what he has told me about being a vampire spawn, I would sooner cut off my own testicles than suggest he do that instead of me. He would have told me to fuck off, and I would have deserved it. Unlike him, I have the deep solace that, no matter how much my own agency was restricted growing up, I had the freedom of my own mind.
The other reason to not fight a hag was that I loathe being called out for my sex and its traditional role back home, and Auntie Ethel zeroed right in on that, with magic to back up her psychological warfare. I noticed she did the same for Wyll and Karlach, though she seemed to have trouble with Shadowheart. I hope the amnesia was protecting her; it might as well do some good.
We did rescue the young woman Auntie Ethel was swaying, and even found the item Auntie Ethel was preparing for her and gave it to her. The young woman wanted her dead husband back, and was willing to give her impending child to a hag, after, I suspect, being browbeat into believing the child would be better off not having a young widow for a mother. There would be other children… or would, if Auntie Ethel didn’t decide that it was easier to just animate the corpse of the young man as a zombie than raise the dead. I probably shouldn’t have activated the item without knowing what it would do, but… it was a terrible situation, and the best I could offer was the clarity that, even if we had not interfered, Auntie Ethel was never meaning to keep to the spirit of her deal.
Personally, if I was ever desperate enough to wish for my brother back, and I got a zombie, I would consider murdering the person making the deal, but I suspect hags are aware who is an actual danger to them, and are more inclined to take precautions.
As for my new friends, we have discovered that we can share memories with one another on purpose. I can’t imagine wanting anyone to see things from my past, but Shadowheart has apparently trusted me enough to show her earliest memory that she hasn’t forgotten, explaining why she is so devoted to her god, and Gale gave us all more details on his little magical problem, which is turning into a big magical problem. He seemed to think that we’d want him to leave for keeping it a secret, but it is the sort of problem where I feel better knowing exactly where Gale is. (Astarion of course, had to give Gale shit about hiding something like this, but I largely think it is because he had to reveal his little problem first, so could bask in the ‘not being the subject of everyone else’s annoyance at keeping dangerous secrets’.)
If we can ever meet up again, and you want to do some research for me in the mean time, add in the Fall of Netheril to things I probably should know more about because they have become suddenly relevant to my life. Sylvia does like the library, so perhaps she would assist. (Yes, this is Gale-related. I got the story of ‘why smart wizards do not try to usurp the god of magic’. Gale did not try that, thank the gods; he can find new and interesting ways to get himself into trouble rather than old and boring ways.)
The owlbear cub is also back. The creature is probably going to meet an ignoble end if someone doesn’t look after him, so I suppose we have a new pet to go with Scratch. I suspect once he gets big enough to be a problem, we’ll have to ask Master Halsin tor recommend a druid to help him establish a territory or whatever it is that young owlbears do once they leave the nest, or the den or whatever. But the cub seems to have accepted us as acceptable surrogate parents. Honestly, having extra senses on hand is nice. Between the seven of us, Withers, Master Halsin, Scratch and the cub, that makes it hard to sneak up on camp. On the other hand, at this rate I will be leading a small army through the Underdark. Which is our next destination. I want to scout ahead for a route towards Moonrise Towers, and hope Madame Lae’zel does not murder me for not seeking out her creche yet.
I haven’t been back to the Underdark since I came to the surface. Wish me luck, dear River.
Your (drow, not mind flayer yet) friend,
Bel
From the Player:
Swamps near Moonhaven
My dear River,
Hags are now on my list of ‘beings to avoid if at all possible’. Largely we stopped in to see ‘Auntie Ethel’ because I don’t like leaving an enemy at our backs, but we interrupted her meeting with a potential victim, and… well, I made some decisions. Sensibly, I should have decided it was none of my business, but I didn’t, and I don’t really know why. Maybe I’m trying to convince Wyll that I am a good man, so I can get him into bed.
To no one’s surprise, the old woman that is literally called a hag and sells potions is an actual hag, and had a tidy little setup as a problem-solver, usually of the ‘be careful what you wish for’ variety. She did offer to try to remove Junior from my head, but I trust Master Halsin’s judgement that it is impossible, so I refused. She told me I’d make a very pretty mind flayer; I don’t know what makes a mind flayer pretty, but if you have to become a brain-eating abomination, you might as well look good doing it.
We found her ‘trophy room’ of people who made ill-advised wishes. Including a wood elf who had wished for foresight, and received the ability to see the fates of himself and others. For him, that meant death, because that one is probably true regardless of what one chooses in life. For me…
…River, when someone looks at me with fear, especially an elf, I make certain assumptions about why they are afraid of me. Namely, that I am a drow and I do try to look dangerous to discourage people trying to start trouble. I hadn’t realized until he named it that what he saw when he looked at me was the mind flayer I might become, and the final, painful transformation and carnage that results. Even after breaking the curse, and seeing that I was merely a drow, he could not be in the same room as me for long because of the sheer horror of those visions. I have to believe that Auntie Ethel wanted him to see only the worst parts of potential futures, or I’m going to go insane.
Auntie Ethel’s defenses were keyed to her magic, and that included an impressive mix of fire traps and poison clouds. To get close enough to deactivate the fire traps, one and to deactivate the poison, which was inside the clouds. Eventually we discovered that the masks she uses to compel people to fight for her disabled the traps when worn, and Shadowheart’s magic could prevent the wearer from falling under Ethel’s control though it was like fighting in deep water to keep moving.
Yes, our plan was to have me — after handing my good armor, weapons and other useful objects other than my tools to Karlach — put the damn mask on and lead everyone through the maze, disabling traps as I went. And I hope never to do it again, because while Shadowheart’s magic protected me from being controlled, I still had Auntie Ethel’s voice in my head trying to get me to drop my defenses and let her 'take care of me'. Such magic requires concentration, so I was very aware that if I missed a trap and Shadowheart was hurt, she might lose focus and suddenly the party would have to fight me until one of them could throw the protection spell back on me, or knock me out.
But Astarion and I are the only two who can disable traps reliably, and given what he has told me about being a vampire spawn, I would sooner cut off my own testicles than suggest he do that instead of me. He would have told me to fuck off, and I would have deserved it. Unlike him, I have the deep solace that, no matter how much my own agency was restricted growing up, I had the freedom of my own mind.
The other reason to not fight a hag was that I loathe being called out for my sex and its traditional role back home, and Auntie Ethel zeroed right in on that, with magic to back up her psychological warfare. I noticed she did the same for Wyll and Karlach, though she seemed to have trouble with Shadowheart. I hope the amnesia was protecting her; it might as well do some good.
We did rescue the young woman Auntie Ethel was swaying, and even found the item Auntie Ethel was preparing for her and gave it to her. The young woman wanted her dead husband back, and was willing to give her impending child to a hag, after, I suspect, being browbeat into believing the child would be better off not having a young widow for a mother. There would be other children… or would, if Auntie Ethel didn’t decide that it was easier to just animate the corpse of the young man as a zombie than raise the dead. I probably shouldn’t have activated the item without knowing what it would do, but… it was a terrible situation, and the best I could offer was the clarity that, even if we had not interfered, Auntie Ethel was never meaning to keep to the spirit of her deal.
Personally, if I was ever desperate enough to wish for my brother back, and I got a zombie, I would consider murdering the person making the deal, but I suspect hags are aware who is an actual danger to them, and are more inclined to take precautions.
As for my new friends, we have discovered that we can share memories with one another on purpose. I can’t imagine wanting anyone to see things from my past, but Shadowheart has apparently trusted me enough to show her earliest memory that she hasn’t forgotten, explaining why she is so devoted to her god, and Gale gave us all more details on his little magical problem, which is turning into a big magical problem. He seemed to think that we’d want him to leave for keeping it a secret, but it is the sort of problem where I feel better knowing exactly where Gale is. (Astarion of course, had to give Gale shit about hiding something like this, but I largely think it is because he had to reveal his little problem first, so could bask in the ‘not being the subject of everyone else’s annoyance at keeping dangerous secrets’.)
If we can ever meet up again, and you want to do some research for me in the mean time, add in the Fall of Netheril to things I probably should know more about because they have become suddenly relevant to my life. Sylvia does like the library, so perhaps she would assist. (Yes, this is Gale-related. I got the story of ‘why smart wizards do not try to usurp the god of magic’. Gale did not try that, thank the gods; he can find new and interesting ways to get himself into trouble rather than old and boring ways.)
The owlbear cub is also back. The creature is probably going to meet an ignoble end if someone doesn’t look after him, so I suppose we have a new pet to go with Scratch. I suspect once he gets big enough to be a problem, we’ll have to ask Master Halsin tor recommend a druid to help him establish a territory or whatever it is that young owlbears do once they leave the nest, or the den or whatever. But the cub seems to have accepted us as acceptable surrogate parents. Honestly, having extra senses on hand is nice. Between the seven of us, Withers, Master Halsin, Scratch and the cub, that makes it hard to sneak up on camp. On the other hand, at this rate I will be leading a small army through the Underdark. Which is our next destination. I want to scout ahead for a route towards Moonrise Towers, and hope Madame Lae’zel does not murder me for not seeking out her creche yet.
I haven’t been back to the Underdark since I came to the surface. Wish me luck, dear River.
Your (drow, not mind flayer yet) friend,
Bel
From the Player:
This is an Auntie Ethel appreciation post, because the game did an excellent job of establishing why you don’t mess with hags, because they will twist what you wanted out of petty spite, and will try to get under your skin about it. And even for a character I’m making up, it worked. Growing up in a community where the only safe place for things that didn’t conform was ‘inside my own head’, means Bel is sensitive about mind control, and the scene with Lorin the wood elf lands because there are drow-specific options for dialog that let you suggest you don't know why Lorin is panicking at you until he says 'mind flayer'.
I found the suggestion for how to get past the poison online; I really didn’t have a better idea other than tank the damage and disable the fire traps. I also had a game over when I discovered the hard way that you do not put on one of those masks unless you have a Protection from Good and Evil spell up, hence me remembering to make sure Bel was disarmed, unarmored and lacked anything like alchemist fire (or much beyond the trap supplies). Since I had picked up some enemy armor, Bel wasn’t doing this in his underwear, which was one saving grace, but he was barefoot.
Also, yes, after doing that Bel is still taking comfort in the fact that the only other person who could disable the traps was Astarion, and as harrowing as that was for anyone, Bel wouldn’t ask someone who has spent far too long under mental compulsion, when it is new and exciting for him. I don’t even think Bel would try to justify it beyond ‘he’s one of us, and I won’t ask him to do something that I won’t do myself’.
Auntie Ethel has custom insults by race, and for each of the origin character; drow are the only ones broken up by sex. And another difference between Bel and his sibling is that Bel has enough of a cultural connection to his birthplace, and to drow masculinity that it can get under his skin. (Another thing I’d do if, post-game, I’d write up Bel as an Origin companion: custom Auntie Ethel insults). I had to do the fight several times, so got ‘bare your throat, spider-bait’ and ‘kneel, boy, just like the matriarchs taught you’. (Now I wonder what you get if you have a non-binary drow, while there are some generic drow lines, one of them calls a drow Tav/Durge out as one of ‘Lolth’s pretty harlots’, and harlot tends to be a female-specific word.)
I did only get the half-elf insults for Shadowheart, but Wyll definitely got called 'Daddy's little regret' and 'the fraud of the Frontiers', and Karlach got called an infernal puppet. So narrative justification, though if I recall, Shadowheart's are all about her Shar worship.
Bel did decide to use the item, but largely out of ‘see what you were willing to pay for?’ Like, it was not kind but Bel figured an unpleasant truth was better than a comforting lie: that if it wasn’t for these adventurers, Mayrina and Connor would be both happy and alive.
Bel is continuing to be circumspect about what he tells friends about his companions. ‘Gale is a walking time bomb’ is one of those things, because it’s not like any of them can do anything about it, besides ‘Gale decides to go find the most isolated spot on the planet and die quietly’. Even killing Gale is off the table, unless they can get his corpse somewhere remote. (Bel doesn’t want to kill Gale. Maybe deliberately order his books by color or something else petty sometimes. The next group of adventurers is getting the ‘if you have any connections to powerful beings, medical conditions including magically-induced ones, amnesia, agendas that you are pursuing while on this quest, or anything else that you might have to reveal after it starts causing us problems, now is the time to tell me’ speech.)
